Bread sauce
Safeway 300ml, £1.29
In another disappointing category this comes joint first for having a bit of onion flavour. Very pasty, though.
***
Morrison's 300ml, 99p
Not a stunning bread sauce but gets points for the texture of the onion mixed in here.
***
Asda 285g, 98p
It's smooth but there's nothing else to it save the flavour of salt. Where's the onion? Where's the spice?
*
Marks & Spencer 340g, £1.99
Practically inedible on account of the salt overload. We certainly didn't want to eat it.
no stars
Tesco 300g, £1.29
Not a bread sauce. Just plain nasty and salty. And the texture is horrendous. There are lumps of uncooked crust.
no stars
Co-op sage and onion stuffing 400g, £1.59
Far too bready. Bounces against the gums, and not much of a pork flavour.
*
Stuffing
Morrison's 450g, £1.39
The runaway winner. Pté texture, pork taste and the kick of orange and cranberry. Lovely.
*****
Somerfield pork apple plum and brandy stuffing 400g, £1.99
A good, strong porky taste, which we admire, though it lacks the final punch to take it to a top score.
****
Safeway best cranberry, orange and port 400g, £2.49
Very fruity and porky. We enjoyed it.
****
M&S apricot and stilton stuffing 340g, £1.99
Very odd. More of a savoury dessert, like Welsh rarebit. Not one for us.
**
Mince pies, shortcrust
Fortnum & Mason traditional mince pies £8.95 for 12, minimum 1kg
The best of the lot, as we would expect. Well-cooked pastry and a good spice to the filling, though it's a little mushy, for which it loses a point.
****
Co-op luxury butter crust mince pies £1.55 for six
The pastry looks good. There's a neat finish to these and an interesting bitter bite from the peel.
***
Waitrose butter-enriched mince pies £2.99 for six
These need more baking to get rid of the raw flour flavour. There is, however, some texture to the filling.
**
Asda extra special all-butter mince pies £1.48 for six
We like the pastry a lot, which is good and crumbly. Let down by the mincemeat which is sultanas and not much else.
**
Kwik Save deep-filled shortcrust 99p for six
No crunch on the pastry and it's only half filled with mincemeat jam. A bad product.
no stars
Christmas vegetable selections
Marks & Spencer honey-roast parsnips with sesame seeds 500g, £3.69
Cut the huge parsnips in half, add more butter, cook for longer and they could be all right.
***
Sainsbury's honey and sesame roasted roots 500g, £2.99
Some pre-preparation has happened here, but that doesn't save them from being underwhelming and gloopy.
**
Safeway ready to roast winter vegetables 800g, £2.79
There is nothing to recommend these. They might have been OK if cooked properly but the stated cooking time was half that required.
*
Tesco golden roasted parsnips and carrots with maple and cranberry glaze 350g, £1.89
Cranberry glaze? Lord save us. And after 35 minutes cooking time it was all still raw. Nasty.
no stars
Somerfield carrots and parsnips with honey and orange butter 250g, £1.99
We gave them an extra 20 minutes. Result: nasty, raw carrots and parsnips.
no stars
Chocolate biscuit selections
Safeway the Best Belgian thins selection 300g, £2.99
The packaging is a little odd, but once you get in there the biscuits are crisp and delicate and the chocolate is good.
*****
Sainsbury's Belgian collection 500g, £4.99
Classy. A good self-confident selection which doesn't make its point through chocolate overload.
*****
Tesco Finest chocolate biscuit selection 700g, £6.49
Looks great in a huge, chocolatey, garish sort of way. But then it is for Christmas.
*****
Somerfield So Good chocolate biscuit selection 500g, £3.99
We are certain that these and the Co-op ones are manufactured by the same people. Both are a fine, utilitarian selection.
***
Co-op luxury chocolate biscuits 500g, £3.99
Taste the same as Somerfield.
***
Canapé selections
Sainsbury's 12 mini topped bruschetta 250g, £2.99
Impressive stuff. Real flavour in the toppings, which were mushroom, caramelised onions and peppers. Crisp toast. Nice.
*****
Somerfield savoury filo parcel selection 240g, £3.49
A cloying spinach and cheese filling to these dry filo pastry parcels. In other words, exactly what you expect of filo pastry parcels.
**
Morrison's mini lattice pastries 342g, £ 1.99
A lot of pastry to filling but still surprisingly light. Rather dull for all that, though.
**
Bigham's cheese and bacon whirls 165g, approx £4.50, available from Waitrose and Booths
These could be cheesier. There could be more bacon. And there could definitely be less grease.
**
Marks & Spencer 18 vegetable tartlettes selection 270g, £4.99
We liked the asparagus ones, but the rest were brutal.
**
Panettone
Tesco Finest 750g, £5.99
We like this. Very moist and though it's a little short on peel, it does have a sultana flavour.
****
Carluccio's panettone tradizionale 1kg, £13.50, stockists 020 7580 3050
The best candied peel of the lot. Not bad.
***
Harvey Nichols panettone 1kg, £10.95; 500g, £5.95
It looks very good, but there's something terribly bready about the dough. Dries on the palate.
***
House of Fraser Finest 500g, £7.25
A weird yellow colour, but it's big on citrus and there's a nice moistness.
***
Marks & Spencer 1kg , £12.99
A sweet loaf of uncut bread. We like the whole almonds on the outside, though.
***
Christmas cake
Asda extra special Christmas cake 1.36kg, £9.98
In a disappointing bunch, this wins. There's a moistness to the cake and a welcome salty edge to the marzipan that cuts through the sugariness. Good. ****
Fiona Cairns Ltd from 1.55kg, £34, available from Harrods, Selfridges and Fortnum & Mason
It looks great, and the cake is moist but there's an overly bitter finish from the lemon peel. ***
Marks & Spencer Connoisseur 1.35kg, £18.99
It looks good but when you cut into the cake it collapses into crumbs. Masses of fruit but not enough cake.
**
Tesco Finest 907g, £9.99
Far too much icing and marzipan and the cake beneath is dry. The decoration sucks.
*
Fortnum & Mason supreme Christmas cake
1.75kg, £45; 2.15kg, £55
A very, very dry cake.
*
Creamy liqueurs
Baileys 700ml, £11.89, widely available
Rich nose of coffee ice cream which is smooth and more robust than the others tested. Rich creamy palate has more texture and density, with less prominent headiness.
****
Sangsters Jamaican rum cream 700ml, £13.99, stockists 020 7378 8858
Bitter chocolate and banana cream nose. The palate, though, has a softer sweetness and thinner texture, more milky than creamy.
***
Tia Lusso 700ml, £11.99, widely available
Strong bitter coffee nose which transfers to the palate with a strong bitter-sweet balance. Not as creamy as others and also drier on finish.
**
Tesco Irish Cream liqueur 700ml, £7.19
Harsh alcoholic burn to nose with white chocolate aroma. Very creamy. Can't distinguish Irish whiskey as the spirit. Heavy 'artificial' chocolate palate and alcohol on finish.
**
Amarula 700ml, £10.99, widely available
Strong coffee and cream frappé-style nose with rich fruity perfume. Palate is tiramisu-like with its combination of coffee, chocolate, cream and alcohol.
***
Sparkling wine
Morrison Cava Brut vintage 2000 75cl, £5.49
Green apples with chestnut purée and yeasty biscuit aromas. More body and spice on the palate with good consistent mousse, and a lengthy finish.
***
Nyetimber 1996 750ml, £19, available from Waitrose
On the nose vibrant crisp cox's pippins are heartened by biscuity aromas. The palate is crisp, fruity and clean, with yeasty richness.
*****
Tesco Cepas de Mendoza No4 cuvee 750ml,£4.99
Creamy peach fruit and vanilla undertones. The full palate is rich in white peaches and not overly aggressive on the mousse which leaves a creamy, lengthy finish.
****
Marks and Spencer Pinot Grigio brut 75cl, £6.99
Softly sparkling mousse is non-aggressive, while the fruit is of grapefruit-sorbet freshness. Medium-length finish is bitter edged and lacking finesse.
**
Marks and Spencer Asti 75cl, £5.99
Sweet-smelling grapes and elderflower cordial. Soft, sweet palate with soft blossom and scented soapy flavours that lack any real substance.
*
· OFM's expert drink taster is Alan Holmes, head sommelier at Petrus at the Berkeley (020 7235 1200). Gary Rhodes at Rhodes Twenty Four, Tower 42 (020 7877 7703)
