Elle Macpherson
La Trompette: Could you order in some langoustines? Elle is on a strict seafood diet. 'I will check with the chef. He won't do that as he wouldn't be able to guarantee the quality of the meat.' Not even for Elle? 'Sorry. We can't do that.'
Sketch: Can you order some crab for Elle even if it's not on the menu? 'I don't think so. I'll check with the chef and call you back tomorrow.' Call within half an hour. 'For Elle, we'll fly some crab in and make a dish especially for her.'
Drones: Could you order some langoustines for Elle? 'They're not on the menu, but if you call me the day before, it's not a problem. How would she like them served?' Not with any fat. . 'OK, that's fine. I'm the chef. I can arrange it.'
Dannii Minogue
La Trompette: The singer Dannii is on a strict diet and can only eat organic lamb from New Zealand. 'We have lamb, but it's Welsh and not organic.' Can you order some other lamb for her? 'I'll check and call you back.'
Sketch: They don't call back. Dannii can only eat organic lamb from New Zealand. 'I've checked with the kitchen and we're able to accommodate special guests so we can order some organic lamb.' From New Zealand? 'The kitchen will do their best.'
Drones: Dannii can only eat organic lamb from New Zealand. Can you get that for her? 'I would have to check with the chef ... He says he can get organic New Zealand lamb for Dannii. Is there any particular way she wants it cooked?'
John Prescott
La Trompette: I'd like to book for the Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott. He wants steak and kidney pudding? 'We don't do that but we have other puddings ... It doesn't matter who the guest is, we won't make something just for him.'
Sketch: It's not on the menu, but John Prescott would like steak and kidney pudding. Is that possible? 'I'm really not sure ... Hold the line. .I've just spoken to our head chef and we could de finitely provide that - just for him.'
Drones: Do you serve steak and kidney pudding? 'No we don't.' Well, I want to book a table for John Prescott and that is what he wants to eat. 'I'll check with the chef and call you back ... Yes, for him, we can make that.'
La Trompette, 5 Devonshire Road, London
Sketch, 9 Conduit Street, London
Drones,1 Pont Street, London
