Nothing brings home the cruel distance between your pre- and post-baby existence quite like holidays. Gone are those long, lazy lunches eating oysters with icy white wine at a table overlooking the sea; in their place, endless scavenging for high chairs, microwaves and baby-changing facilities.Which is why Luxury Family Holidays is such a genius idea. Scattered across the country, its grand country houses are properly swish, while at the same time offering cots, creches – even babysitters.

We visited Ickworth in Suffolk, National Trust pile and one-time seat of the late, impressively dissipated John Hervey (7th Marquess of Bristol, half-brother to It-Girl Victoria). Outside is a sprawl­ing estate to explore, with ancient church and vine­yard; inside the boutique decor allows strung-out parents to masquerade as world-weary jet-setters. Best of all, the prospect of a leisurely dinner free from wailing infants. I felt a guilty thrill at the child-unfriendly candle, white linen and goldfish bowl-sized glasses of red wine. Service was attentive and friendly, the locally sourced food well cooked and presented. And not a mashed banana in sight.

If the thronging numbers of ­children – in the pool, cycling in the driveway, enthroned in high chairs in the cafe – gave the smart surroundings a slightly surreal, Ballardian air, this was more than compensated for by just how easy the whole set-up made it to relax both with and without the kids. And, of course, ghettos can be supportive – no one here made you feel like a pariah for spoil­ing the sexy vibe with your sticky pots of puréed parsnip. Hervey, a devotee of cocaine, heroin and rent boys, is probably t­urning in his grave.

Stay at Ickworth, from £170 per room per night (with breakfast and dinner).