If you write about wine for a living, watching a promotional video can provide a welcome diversion from the business of traipsing around vineyards and cellars. Producers are keen to show it, having paid some D-list television presenter a lot of loot to do the voiceover, and journalists are more than happy to sit in a dark auditorium and laugh at the idealised image of itself the company is desperate to present. 'Family values are as important today as they were in the 1920s,' intones a film about a dysfunctional bunch who clearly hate one another's guts.
I was certainly expecting a few laughs when I visited the sparkling wine producer Freixenet in Spain recently. Freixenet, whose Cordon Negro is the best-selling sparkling wine in the UK, is the Disneyland of the Spanish wine industry, complete with train rides, a corporate mission statement and a very expensively produced corporate video.
Watching the film in a plush theatre, it was clear that the company had persuaded a lot of famous people to drink its product, from Penélope Cruz and Raquel Welch to José Carreras and Pilar López de Ayala (a Spanish actress, apparently). But my favourite moment was a shot of a female Russian cosmonaut called Helena Kondakova seeing in the New Year with a glass of Cordon Negro. Even in space, there's no escaping Freixenet ...
As well as introducing me to Helena, the video contained some remarkable figures. Or distressing ones, depending on your point of view. Freixenet makes 120 million bottles of Cava a year and claims to be responsible for 75 per cent of Cava's exports. The fact that Cordon Negro is one of the least appealing sparkling wines on the market doesn't seem to stop people buying it. I've given up telling people to drink Codorníu or the Freixenet-owned but infinitely preferable Segura Viudas instead because the famous black bottle (only slightly naffer than a mullet) is a huge selling point.
Excluding champagne, more than half of the sparkling wine we drink in the UK is Cava. There are a few decent ones, but it generally sells on price (as low as £2.97 in one supermarket last year). But whatever its shortcomings, Cava is driving the sparkling wine category very nicely, thank you, at the moment. We can't get enough fizz, whether from Spain, Italy, France, New Zealand, Australia, South Africa or the United States. And it doesn't stop us drinking huge amounts of champagne, too.
The number two UK sparkling wine brand, Martini Asti, isn't much better than Cordon Negro, unless you like something that tastes like partially fermented, sherbet flavoured grape juice. But after that the picture gets a lot more interesting, especially in the New World, where the top sparkling wines are every bit as good as most non-vintage champagne and usually considerably cheaper. New Zealand in particular is producing some fantastic wines these days.
You might not want to be seen drinking the preferred tipple of Ukip MEPs, but the same is true of the UK. English fizz is a home-produced wine that you can drink without wincing or blushing. The top cuvées from the likes of Nyetimber and Ridgeview are often mistaken for something much posher from Reims or Epernay. They're not as cheap as Cava (few wines are), but they're considerably more sophisticated. Perhaps someone should tell Penélope Cruz.
Six sparkling wines
Palau Cava Rosado (£4.99, Booths)
Made from the local Trepat variety (and yes, it was a new one on me too), this has to be the best value sparkling wine in the UK at the moment. Soft and strawberryish with none of the bitterness that often mars cheap Cava.
Araldica Gavi Sparkling Brut (£6.99, Sainsbury's; £4.99 from 18 August for four weeks)
Another bargain, especially at the reduced Wine Festival price. This uncomplicated Italian fizz is a bright, youthful, almost grapey bubbly with refreshing citrus fruit acidity and plenty of fruit.
Lindauer Special Reserve Brut (£8.99, Tesco; Asda; Wine Rack; Threshers; Oddbins; Waitrose; Majestic)
It's no surprise that this wine is so widely stocked. In my tastings, it consistently delivers the goods under £10, making it New Zealand's best value fizz. It's a creamy, pink-tinged number with lots of concentration and no little finesse.
Jansz Premium Cuvée (£10.99, Oddbins)
Produced in cool-climate Tasmania, this is consistently one of Australia's most refined sparkling wines, showing the elegance and subtlety of a good champagne but at a much more affordable price.
2000 Ridgeview Bloomsbury, Cuvée Merret (£14.99, Waitrose)
I don't know if the rumours about the champagne houses investing in the UK are true, but this finely crafted blend of mainly Chardonnay, with some Pinot Noir and Pinot Meunier ought to convince them of the potential of English fizz.
My best buy
Cloudy Bay Pelorus, Marlborough (£13.75, Majestic; or £11 if you buy two)
This deserves to be just as well known as Cloudy Bay's Sauvignon Blanc because it's one of the most complex New World sparkling wines. It's a big, bold, toasty style with a lot of power and a lovely dry finish.