There is a difference between celebrity dining and posh dining. Celebrities go to Nobu, where they've got no clue what they're eating. It's more a question of: is this food fashionable? Or they'll go to Gordon Ramsay, because they've heard of him. If you're really posh, you'd go to Scott's, or The Ivy. Or, if you were in Paris, you'd go to the Voltaire. In Rome, you go to - what's the place we all adore? Dal Bolognese ! In New York you'd go to Graydon Carter's new restaurant the Waverly Inn. It's fun. It's hearty food, too. Hearty's posh. All posh people like breakfast food, or nursery food. But not boarding-school food. It's Nanny, isn't it? Nanny equals comfort. But celebrity eating is just ... another ritual to get dressed up for. It's another entrance.
In the country, proper posh people eat at their own houses. A good country house revolves around vegetables. Broad beans are the poshest food there is. Everyone always says: 'Oh, I love broad beans!' I adore peas. They're a non-food, you can't get fat on them. When I'm at home, I just have fresh peas and a bit of stock.
Princess Diana's favourite pudding was sticky-toffee pudding, which is quite a new pudding. Never happened in our youth. Does it take endorsement by someone like Diana, to make a pudding acceptable? Well, Diana only endorsed it to me - I don't know if she endorsed it to everybody else! I sent a message before she came to dinner, saying: what's your favourite food? She said: fish and sticky-toffee pudding. Tasting menus are very common. I've never been to The Fat Duck - I'd rather die! Being clever with food is frightfully common. Soup and sausages, that's what you want! My old friend Lady Diana Cooper used to say that the only two ingredients for a good dinner party are too much to drink and a chocolate pudding.
The English have a very stupid idea about coffee. They think that one espresso will wake you up, but it doesn't. The whole point about espresso is that one espresso will put you to sleep, and two will keep you awake. And everyone says: 'Cappuccino! I'll have a cappuccino!' It's so common. Only the lowest of the low drink cappuccino in Italy. And latte! Ridiculous. You should never, never have milk in your coffee after 11 o'clock. It's very bad for you.
Using the wrong knife, I don't think that matters, does it? It's a bit of a bore if you use the wrong one, and then the plates are cleared, and you're left with a tiny little butter knife, when what you need is something substantial. But I don't think not knowing matters.
Napkins: well, I like linen of course! But now you can get those frightfully nice paper ones that feel like linen. And kitchen roll is better than dainty paper napkins. Hand round a kitchen roll!
I'm anti-wine. Though I'm very happy about the resurgence of pink wine, which you must call 'pink wine', and never 'rosé'. Château Léoube is absolutely wonderful. It's brown almost, the colour of watered-down Elastoplast, and you get it in Selfridges. It's common to know too much about wine, however. And changing glasses between different wines is awful. It's common to say 'red wine', you should just say 'wine'. Red wine is 'wine', and white wine is 'white wine'. I never believe that they make all the champagne in Champagne because it's about the size of Belgravia, so how could they possibly make all that stuff there?
I love cocktails, but old-fashioned ones. The best one's a Gibson, a Martini made with pearl onions, and a bit of onion juice. Always gin. Never vodka. Vodka Martinis are common, the whole point of a Martini is the taste of the gin. Beer's delicious if you mix it with tomato juice: a Bloody Beer, ever had that? As for soft drinks, well, Coke's it, isn't it? No one drinks Tizer any more. Although I'll tell you what is quite smart: Fanta. And red Bounties. I adore red Bounties.
