Kate Moss

Kate Moss wanted to come in and have Christmas dinner and wondered if she could bring one of the turkeys she raised in the Cotswolds to have it cooked? 'Erm, I'm not sure if health and safety would allow us to do that. We need to know where it has been killed.' What if she bought it in still alive? 'Erm, I've never had to deal with this kind of request before. I would have to ask the head chef - we wouldn't be able to kill or pluck it on these premises, we're not an abattoir you know. I'll call you back.' They call back. 'I've spoken to the head chef and he's happy to do this.' Cool. Would she need to bring it in alive? 'God no. It needs be dead with certification of where it came from and where it was killed.' Will you pull the feathers out? 'No, that would also need to be done though you can leave the head and feet on.'

Elizabeth Hurley

Could we bring in some food to have it cooked for a Christmas meal? 'No, we don't let customers bring in their own produce.' What about a turkey? 'Er, I don't think that makes any difference.' Well Elizabeth Hurley wanted to bring in one of the turkeys she's raised. 'We've had a similar enquiry and they were going to make an exception, but she should speak to the manager.'